30 weeks, and learning

30 weeks pregnant. Wow. It seems like yesterday I was handing Dean the pee stick and watching his face light up. This baby has been so wanted and so loved from the very moment it was conceived.

This pregnancy has really been a learning journey for me. It’s helped me better define who I am, what I stand for, and how I behave as a person. Afterall, this person is going to be a mother. Someone is going to be looking up to me, taking from my actions what they should do.

I’ve learned that I forgive easily – more easily than a lot of people I know. I give readily, and some times a bit too much, feel compassion for anyone, and love deeply those around me.

Someone I know said to me that I sounded like I had grown up a lot. That comment struck me, because I hadn’t really thought about it, but I have. Starting well before this pregnancy, but perhaps intensifying through it, I have transformed. I’m still the happy, loving, fun person I was, but I’ve aged like a cheese, growing a rind of laid back, less spastic-ness and warmth. That rind protects me from those little comments and hurts that would have stayed with me and bothered me for months. I can now honestly let go of wrongs or hurts. My life is my life.

The world does not revolve around me. What a statement.

Anyway, 30 weeks. Baby is getting really big (well, to me) and is weighing in at 3lb and about 15inches long! There’s still a few months left, and during this time s/he’ll be getting longer and gaining more good fat. I think the baby has moved a bit lower into my pelvis because I have hips again. Either that or my hips have spread AROUND the baby, which is also a possibility…

I feel really tired, and listless. I’m not sure what to do. I feel like there’s so much that needs to be done, that I can’t possibly get done all at once, so I don’t do anything. Well, that’s not true, but it takes prompting from Dean or my conscience. My goal for the day is to clean the bedroom, do all the laundry, and put the clean dishes away. I think that’s do-able.

I’m going to post the 28 week picture back where it belongs, and the 30 week pic will come tonight when Dean gets home.


1 Comment »

  1. mom Said:

    All I can say is WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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